Emerging into a dating relationship

The vast majority of these guys are not the self-centered, testosterone-led, immature boys you met (and maybe married) in your 20s or 30s. )If you’ve read my e Book, 7 Secrets to Finally Finding Love after 40, you know that I believe that empathizing with men is essential to your dating and relationship success.Like you, the men you’re dating have lived and learned. The only way you can empathize is to know their side of the story.David and Holly Petraeus don't fit the mold, say, of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver, since Holly Petraeus has not been nearly as prominent as her military-hero-turned-CIA-chief husband of 38 years.And we don't know, yet, whether their marriage will survive.How can people be so happy for so long, only to then have the marriage turn sour in what are supposed to be their "golden years" together? Some relationships have been in decline for decades and finally lose all their juice. It's more like a balloon that has been seeping air for a long time. Another possibility is that a couple's issues intensify.

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On top of that, she is dealing with public humiliation — as well as the destabilizing presence of a child.They were the originators of a higher divorce rate, and while that divorce rate has slowed, we may be seeing a spike as people ponder whether or not they will stay with their spouses into extreme old age.So, yes, there are plenty of reasons why a couple who have been married for 30, 40, even 50 years might break up.But what we do know is that while questions of infidelity grab the most headlines, having an extramarital affair is not what's behind the breakup or divorce of most long-term relationships.The AARP Sex, Romance and Relationships Survey on the sexuality of people 45 and older found that extramarital affairs happen for only a relatively small number of couples.

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