Yes, you seem to understand from an experiential standpoint. It might just be an intuitive thing rather than an intelligence thing.They are all brighter than average and I love them immensely, but my point is that I don't think I could take that in a partner.It happens in a split second and no one else ever noticed they missed a thing, but we both had the mutual satisfaction of our silent exchange.... Those are the kind of moments I would like to share with a mate. I believe something like what I described could be cultivated with knowing a person and with time, but every once in a while a very special person comes into my life who "gets it" from the start. She had a photographic memory and was , but she also had bipolar disorder.
It's just a trait I want that happens to be really uncommon.Then, you have matters of faith/belief/philosophy to deal with, which cuts out still more. ..the unlikely event that all of those other things align, there is always this glaring reality: If the attraction isn't there from the start, I have never been able to cross that emotional divide from platonically enjoying someone as a friend (and deeply) to being physically/romantically attracted to them.Stories like the ones that have popped up on Ask Reddit seem impossible for someone like me, because I'm either attracted to them from the first or I'm not and never will be.She is very intelligent, driven, talented, and I very immediately thought to myself "Ah, I have met a rare person indeed. I can't make myself be attracted to anyone and that switch just ain't gonna flip. Just mutual respect and the willingness to try and understand one another.Perhaps we will be great friends." As we've talked I've been impressed with her conviction and the uncommon level of right-headed objectivity she has about, well, everything! She's sharp, responsible, creative, cordial, genuine, and deep, and fiscally responsible if a little emotionally blunted. She doesn't put any effort into her appearance. A lot of us do probably have ego problems, but when I say I value intelligence it's not that I just think everyone out there is dumb.